The way things are done in Uganda leaves a lot to be desired. But they always enjoy what they are doing. They can talk about a problem for more than a week, while someone in Europe will call the mechanic within five minutes.
Everything is different here, and things take their natural course. There are no such things as problems, only solutions, which always come from an unexpected source. There is a solution for every problem, and every solution will produce two problems in return. For sure, it’s great to talk about problems with a bunch of men for a whole day. In Europe, we would call that bullshit, but here we call it deliberation.
The new prosperity is a problem of an entirely different order in Uganda. New shopping malls are springing up everywhere, and they are accessible for everyone. From young to old, and from poor to rich, people go there to shop, look around, or just hang out.
Everybody understands that you have to pay for things that you buy, but a few people don’t even know how a urinal works. There are signs clearly showing how you should and should not use them. You can’t sneak at your neighbour; you are not permitted to drop your pants to your ankles while you use the urinal; you are not allowed to aim from a five-meter distance. And to keep the best for last: you are not allowed to sit down on the urinal to deliver a number two.
These are all rules of etiquette that we don’t even think about in Europe because our parents taught us when we were children. Here it is different; a new world is literally opening up for a whole population with new buildings and the accompanying new customs. In these new malls, it becomes apparent that it’s not always easy to learn how things go. There are assistants available to explain how things are done. It often causes great amusement when things threaten to go wrong.
Did you know that the Romans experienced the same thing when they arrived in Batavia 2000 years ago, and we had never seen a bath house before? So, please, enough bullshit on this subject for now.
Feico Smit, General Manager, Royal van Zanten, Uganda
